If you were able to read my last two lengthy posts you are now privy to the fact that I lost a child to abortion on October 7, 2000. Not ever having a fully repentant heart I never managed to abandon my lifestyle of sexual promiscuity. Sex had become my painstakingly warped way to connect with a man. It was my subconscious way of getting love, although it would inevitably always bring me emptiness, more loneliness, and a host of other maladies.
I am a firm believer that men and women are wired quite differently when it comes to sex. I am of the mind-set that men are more biologically driven and that the experience for them is almost entirely physical. I’m not saying that men can’t experience love and sex at the same time. There are always men who are exceptions to the rule (statiticians call them outliers). I’m just saying that I think men are largely driven by physical urges, whereas for most well-adjusted women, it’s an emotional experience.
I’ll go on record here to say that I absolutely love sex. I’m serious. It’s a shame I’m not married, because I’d be a really good wife, if you know what I mean! I don’t just love the physicality of having sex, I love the feeling of being that close to someone I love. For this reason, I kind of feel like the universe has “Punked” me. I mean, I hear about married women all the time who will not satisfy their husbands. Or oftentimes, I hear of married couples who simply haven’t had sex with each other in years.
It drives me nuts that for me, a single women, sex is a sin that I commit inside my body, while for the married folk, it’s actually an act of worship unto the Lord. Are you kidding me? So here I am with all this drive and nothing to do with it at the present time. And please, if you’re married don’t give me any advice on what to do with all this unused sexual energy. There’s nothing you can say to make me think you understand.
If you’ve read Gary Chapman’s Book, “The Five Love Languages“, you’d know that Dr. Chapman has identified 5 love languages:
Acts of service
Words of affirmation